I hired a coach a few weeks ago -- a first for me. We are working on my relationship with food, which is basically a proxy for my relationship with life and myself. For whatever reason, this has been a focal point of my life, for a long time. A recurring "problem" of my life. …
Category: What’s here now
When life gets overwhelming
Sometimes it feels like life is moving very fast. When I focus on that, I get dizzy. The truth is that I am capable of moving with the flow of life and not being overwhelmed. This means embracing life as it is and accepting all that comes... it means taking real action without hesitating or …
Vacation eyes ‘Work’ warily and dreams of Art
I am in California at my dad's house, which is in the middle of a remodel process. I came here for a night after spending a week with my mom and brothers in Mendocino. This is a week of 'vacation'. It's the first significant holiday I've taken from work in the last year. When I …
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Not starting with “Sorry”
My mom and I are both cleaning out our closets right now. She calls me to tell me that she got my letter and it made her weepy. That she's going through all the papers in her house and has a hundred pounds of old bills to get rid of; how much lighter it feels, …
The hurt only asks for love
Hello, end of another day. A beautiful day. A full day. Sweetness in my heart. Exploring my feelings, like they are a person. I find myself in the feeling, a small child, who wants to play. Even when the feeling hurts; so often we run away from the hurt, but underneath the hurt there is …
We have to say goodbye, to make room for something new
I feel a great movement in my life. I feel it in my heart right now, like a weight, the heaviness that is all of this life swirling around me, ever-changing, outside the grasp of my fingers; no matter how tightly they close, I am left with air, and myself. We have to say good-bye, …
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Reflections on a day: “right timing”
It's a lovely warm night... I have been so looking forward to the warm nights. They make me want to be a vampire. It is so blissful to be driving, in the nighttime. So quiet. Such a blank canvas. Part of me drifts, is at peace. I've been wanting to get a little high, more …
Marie Kondo’ing my life, pt. 1
This week the name "Marie Kondo" kept popping up in my world. I'm behind the ball on this one, because I don't keep up with most pop culture things. I guess she has a TV show. I haven't seen it, but for some reason I saw her name, and it stood out to me. So …
Wear Things That Make You Feel Sexy
Boldness. Something I am meditating on. Trying on for size. Experimenting with. Boldness is a state of being. It doesn't ask how or why. It just is. One of my newest desires, when it comes to boldness: Buy sexy clothes. Wear sexy clothes everywhere. For different environments, just wear different kinds of sexy. Like, have …
Poetry from inside a tree
I I made mistakes last night. Got swept up. A part of me lives eternally in the darkness and refuses to sleep. It feels good, sometimes, to be her. But then I wake up in my body, full of regret. II The sun's soft rays pierce my ankles and wrists through windstrewn leaves. A gentle …
Expressions from this side of the here & now 